Hints Your Child Might Not Want to Play Intramural Soccer
February 25, 2011 § 13 Comments
I am far too imperfect to ever tell another parent how they should handle their child. Oh no. I don’t possess that kind of gall. I do have a mediocre soccer ability and am fortunate other adults let me help during intramural sports. The children involved are fun, at varying levels of soccer experience, and possess energy a dog with a red rubber ball would envy. I’ve noticed that one young lady might not be enjoying the experience. If you, as a parent, wonder if your child should be playing intramural soccer, here are some small indications she might be better suited for another extra curricular activity:
1. She blatantly says, “I really don’t want to be here.” Or “I hate soccer.”
2. She tugs on her coach’s arm every five minutes and says, “It’s hot. I hate being outside. Can I go get water now?”
3. She brings a bouquet of wild flowers to her coach and says, “I picked these for my mother because this drill is boring. Can I go give them to her and then wash my hands because they got dirty?”
4. She raises her hand at the beginning of a drill and says, “I don’t get what we’re supposed to do.” The coach has explained it, but she explains it again and demonstrates it for the girl after which the little girl raises her hand and says, “I still don’t get it.” The coach asks her to go to the end of the line and watch the drill until she understands. After two or three players go, the little girl comes back to the front shouting, “I GET IT NOW.” The coach is thrilled but asks her to go back to her place in the line. “But I get it now,” the little girl replies. The coach is still happy, but wants the children to stay in line (it is possible the coach is being a hardass). When the little girl raises her hand again, the coach twitches on the inside, but smiles. “Can I go tell my mother I get the drill?”
5. She gets upset when there is grass or dirt on her clothes.
6. She asks to be on the defense because there isn’t much running.
7. She asks to be goalie because there is even less running than a defensive position.
8. She gets tired of standing as goalie and lies down on the grass.
9. She complains the grass is too scratchy while lying down.
10. She screams when she sees a bee.
11. She screams when she hears a bee.
12. She asks if she can tell her mother she saw and heard a bee.
This little girl does have that perfect extra curricular activity out there for her, she just has to find it. Trial and error. Here are a few suggestions:
1. Hippie Stuff. Basket weaving without the prickly sticks or making crowns out of flowers. No bees, no mud, no drugs (Well, they might mellow her out a little. You will forget I said that *waves hand*). Her mother should be readily available to dote and fawn over everything she makes.
2. An art class. One that would preferably involve little to no art supplies as it could get on her hands and clothes. She’d also need a stool with a back to it. If she sat in a backless stool for long, she’d start to complain her back had nothing to rest on. She’d then ask to lay down on the floor to rest her back. And then she’d complain the floor was too cold or too hard, could she stand instead? And then she’d complain her feet were tired, could she sit on the stool again? And then she’d…
3. Music class. Not an instrument that recquired any breathing control like the flute, clarinet, saxophone, trumpet, etc. She’d get winded. Maybe an instrument that still sounded pretty even for beginners. A xylophone.
4. Cooking classes. She probably shouldn’t stir anything for long. Her arm would get tired. She couldn’t be around an oven or stove top either now that I think about it. That would be too hot. Nevermind about the cooking classes.
5. Hourse back riding
5. Karate. She couldn’t spar with the other children, but would wear the super-cool Gi and belt.
6. Lego club. Honestly, this might work. No winning, no losing, air conditioned, the chairs would most likely have backs, and when her fingers got tired she could show her mother all her progress. There’d be snacks. I like it.
There’s a place for everyone in this world and she will find her spot. And her soccer coach is more than happy to continue teaching her the foundations of the sport if it is what she wants to learn, but the little girl has made it very clear that she does not enjoy it. At all.
Still, her coach rejoices in her small triumphs and is excited when she gets her foot on the ball.