You

April 16, 2010 § 12 Comments


If you are anything at all like me, today is ridiculously better than yesterday. Why would today be better than yesterday? Because yesterday blew chunks of pig stock and today is Friday. There are other reasons.

You read Beth Black’s blog first thing in the morning and that tiny morsel of deliciousness just makes your heart sing with her words.

You can’t find your pants because of strange twitter conversations with Tawna Fenske, which forces you to put on a skirt. This isn’t as bad as it sounds because it makes you feel kind of fancy.

You give yourself a little break with this hot mess of a manuscript and know that the second draft will be just as hard as the first. You remind yourself the story is there and that you’re a good writer.

 You go to the bookstore for story time and read books while your baby plays with the train table. While there, you notice a book you’ve never heard of before, “Look at this [explicative] Hipster” based on the coordinating website. You don’t offend easily, so you find it hilarious, but others might not like it (Grandma and Pastor Eric, don’t click on that.).

You let your baby walk around with the book and enjoy the other customer’s stares. The explicative word is on the cover for all to see and your baby just smiles at them all. It is very humorous to you.

You buy a book that you and your spouse want to read together.

You speak with the athletic director on the phone. He tells you he’s sorry for the troubling season but thinks you’ve done a great job and that you’re a wonderful tennis coach. This makes you happy.

You don’t say the automatic phone sign out like you did a month ago:

 “Okay, I’ll talk to you later. Love you.”

 To which he replied, “What?”

 “Nothing. I’ll see you at church. Tell your wife I said hello.”

You pick up a McDonalds Happy Meal for your daughter (which she adores) and you say aloud what you think in your head all the time: “These nuggets look like the Korean Peninsula.” 

You come home and still can’t find your pants. You don’t care.

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§ 12 Responses to You

  • You are so sweet. I’m glad today is better for you. 🙂

  • Tawna Fenske says:

    I’m sorry, I cut a tail-hole in your pants and put them on my dog. You can have them back, but you’ll have to grow a tail in order for them to fit properly.

    Nevertheless, I’m glad your day is going well!

    Tawna

  • Patty says:

    You all crack me up and warm my heart all the way down to my toes. Glad I found you on twitter.

  • Daryl Sedore says:

    Awesome Post! I was wondering though…how does one become a Hipster?

    Also, love that you wrote this in 2nd person P.O.V. Refreshing and fun.

    You will have a spat with Tawna. You will enjoy it. Then you blog about it. You soon realize people flock to your site. You see her stats are up. You both laugh and pour more wine. You have the ear of the world…

    Thanks again.

    Daryl

  • harleymay says:

    Beth, I meant every word. You keep being you and I’ll forever be a fan.

    Tawna, we are evil twins.

    Patty, what a lovely compliment and thank you for commenting! I look forward to getting to know you better.

    Daryl, the 2nd person pov was an experiment, I’d never done it before and really enjoyed it. Thank you for commenting and I’ll see you on twitter!

  • Simon says:

    I’m reading David Sedaris to my 4 and 3 year olds as bedtime stories. I plan on moving on to Chuck Palahniuk next, and after that possibly Hunter S. Thompson. They’ll thank me when they’re grown.

    I make them pay for the books when we’re at the bookstore. The cashiers stare, but the amusement is worth their judgment.

    I think I understand you, good lady. This may or may not give me warm fuzzies.

  • harleymay says:

    Simon, stop kidding yourself. I always give you warm fuzzies. And to clarify, I did not buy the “Look at this [explicative] Hipster” book, but only let baby boy walk around the store with it. You know how I like the shock factor.

  • Bumby says:

    harlymay, you just made my laugh out loud at the public lib. 5 stares.

    Thanks,
    Always Bumby

  • Bumby says:

    Sorry I misspelled your name, That’s what an Ivy league Education will get you.

    Always Bumby

  • I am wearing a skirt today for a ladies’ tea at my church. It’s no fun.
    The skirt-wearing, that is. The tea will be lovely.

    May each day be brighter than the last one,
    Jen

  • harleymay says:

    Thank you, Bumby and Jen. You two are great.

  • I love this. Because it is laced with humor and humility, rawness and reality. And also because I am so so familiar with the “off” days where thing are dingy and damp, were details fall through existential cracks, where nothing coheres. But the amazing thing is that the day after is always leagues better. Alas, ’tis life.

    Great post. You can write, my dear 🙂

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